Yeah…that’s what I thought

April 22nd 2025

Have your dreams been incredibly vivid lately?

Exhausting even?

Hard to clear from your mind even hours after waking?

You’re not alone.

The past few weeks it seems myself and nearly everyone I speak to whether it’s a neighbor across the street, a client, or a friend outta town — deciphering and decompressing from our dreams has been taking up a lot of our waking hours.

Keeping track of prophetic and lucid dreams, while fantastic for building trust in our innate abilities and how our wisdom translates and illustrates things for us personally…

It can also be downright unsettling at times.

To see just how on it we can be.

Even when we don’t wanna be.

Rygel clearly saying- “Damn girl. Ain’t that some shit.” Authors Photo

There’s so many truths I haven’t wanted to see about people in my waking life that I’ve been able to observe with less guilt in my dreams, then had those observations validated within days or even hours.

In one dream a few years ago, a friend I’d long before cut communication with came skipping up to me in a school hallway like a smug twelve year old. She was even wearing pigtails and wearing a mini plastic backpack.

“I’m doing so great. I just wanted you to know,” she smirked.

I turned to see that she was literally the size of a middle schooler and I looked down at her, confused by her demeanor as well as her vague statement after years of not speaking.

I replied with the spice of a stale saltine cracker, “That’s…great. I’m glad to hear it.”

She smirked again withholding any further information and skipped down the hallway from wense she came.

The next day not long after jotting down the dream, a friend messaged me saying he was in the middle of a text exchange with a realtor friend who was currently out to lunch with his clients and texting their names with his phone under the table while continuing conversation around their closing date and such above the table. (Now…yes, this was in bad form on the realtors part but alsoooo fantastic confirmation for me at the time so ya know what? I’ll allow it. All is fair in love and real estate or something like that.)

“You went to school with a Such AndSuch didn’t you?” he texted my friend

“Yes…”

“I thought so… WELL…”

The gossip was relayed to me and I recounted her cryptic message in the dream as if she were tapping my shoulder to call checkmate at a game I didn’t even know we were playing.

Ahhh so that’s why she came skipping up to me like a smug middle schooler…

And the way I saw her represented in my dream?

Pretty on the nose unfortunately.

It was a growing side of her I’d reasoned away for years when she’d smile after embarrassing me publicly or watch me fall both literally and figuratively and glow with satisfaction.

For many of us who are deeply empathic, not only do we regularly feel others emotions as our own, but we are incredibly intuitive and natural psychics. Sometimes we just don’t know it because we often struggle to recognize and validate our own strengths. (I’ll write a whole other piece on that one.)

What’s interesting is that I find most of us feel an innate need to use those abilities to protect and fight for others first, and ourselves when we’ve just plain run out of options.

So what happens when we realize that some of the underdogs we were fighting so hard for were actually the ones peeing in our shoes and chewing holes in our underwear all along?

Those can be painful complicated bonds to dissolve.

They run deep through lifetimes of learning, and they’re meant to.

It takes time, consistent practice, and compassion for ourselves to let people own their own pain and piss on their own rugs.

Our sleeping dreams can serve as a safe sandboxes for those painful truths to play out before us. For us to stand up for ourselves and recognize injustices we commit against ourselves without the guilt or shame we’ve often carried for letting others be exactly who they are — the best and worst.

I keep thinking of this quote I read in an Alice Hoffman book recently,

“No person is as bad as the worst thing they’ve done.”

Boy do I agree with that.

But my God, I wish some people would stop trying to make their worst parts an aesthetic am I right?

The theme that’s been showing up in the majority of my dreams lately is this:

In order for us to expand, we have to first be willing to see what’s restricting us and choose to free ourselves from it.

What agreements have we made with others at the expense of our own authenticity?

What inaccurate views have we had about ourselves that are actually accurate for someone else?

Who are we afraid of hurting by showing up even brighter?

Our relationships serve as our biggest catalysts for growth.

Sometimes it’s because they are safe foundations full of love and support.

And sometimes it’s because of the exact opposite.

They teach us when to lean in and be vulnerable even when it’s scary and when to pull back and choose ourselves even when it’s painful.

This old friend in particular who has been showing up almost nightly in my dreams for the past week continues to teach me about how I will forever and always have people who seethe at the sight of my happiness and it doesn’t have a damn thing to do with me.

One of the last times she was in my home she’d gotten there in the early afternoon visibly frazzled but assuring me it was just the traffic on the way over.

I knew it wasn’t but said nothing.

The sun was streaming through the windows and I made us each a cup of tea to sit and talk in the living room, but the cloud wasn’t lifting.

The longer we talked, the harder it got for me to focus my eyes on her face.

After an hour or so I was finding it hard to make out her facial features at all. It was just a blur.

I kept getting up to turn on more lights while saying to her, “Keep talking I’m listening!”

By the time she was about to leave, every light in the house was on and my eyes were exhausted from trying to focus.

It looked like a thick fog had rolled into my living room and kitchen and I could barely see anything clearly without squinting.

I didn’t wanna weird her out but it was weirding me out enough that after she pulled out of the driveway, I called and made an appointment at the optometrist for the next day.

Surprise surprise… my eyes looked just fine.

The lesson for me being- The truth was literally right in front of my face. The bullshit was so thick I couldn’t cut through it with every single lamp, recessed light, and hard squint I tried.

And still, rather than accept the painful fact that I knew what was up and this tie needed to be cut I thought, “Hmph…better get these peepers checked out.”

Please don’t let anyone tell you it’s a one and done cord cutting when it comes to relationships, the ones we have with others and the ones we have with ourselves.

Some truly do travel through layers and lives that are meant to be addressed and healed at just the right moments.

If you’re having more and more vivid and realer than real dreams? Let them show you what you’re ready to be free from, how you’re ready to expand and love even deeper, what fears you’re ready to face and darkness you’re ready to love even when it feels rebellious and rude.

I love you! Thank you for reading.